Imperfect but insightful: what dripping candles in Mexico taught me about life

I used to have mixed feelings about burning candles. While I enjoyed the soft light and different designs, they also stressed me out. Watching dripping wax and the candle almost melting down to the base made me anxious. Whenever I had visitors over, my eyes would stray mid-conversation and start focussing on the flame emitted by the candle on the table. While watching movies, I’d give the candles on the sideboard the leading role by mentally preparing to blow them out before they could melt into a puddle. The driver of this behaviour? My aversion to scraping off any wax that had gone rogue.

A few weeks ago, I travelled to Mexico for a month and came across many a dripping candle in several hotels, restaurants and shops. My first thought? Imagine the work to scrape it all off! My second? Hey, maybe that’s not even a thing here? Judging by all the layers of wax, I started to think that this free flow might actually be intentional. By chance, I saw a hotel employee replacing a candle stick. Turns out, he opted for a different colour than the previous one that had burned down. I don’t know if this was a conscious decision, but the result was impressive. The rainbow-coloured traces of wax transformed the simple stone candle holders into real eye-catchers.

Inspiration through new perspectives

Why it took a trip to Mexico to have this realisation has something to do with the country’s interior design style, buildings and cities. Dripping wax is just one of the wonderful imperfections I came across. There are also loose cables hanging from houses and poles, large, discarded blocks of ice on the street, uneven pavements – all of which seemed more charming than imperfect in Mexico City. On the other hand, I was more in tune to what was going on around me. I had time to take a close look at my surroundings and was open to new things.

Calmness by letting go

Back in Zurich, I’ve decided to let my candles run free. I still make sure they’re placed on a large, fireproof surface, but keep calm if the wax goes places it shouldn’t. If a candle starts dripping the «wrong» way, I no longer jump up from the sofa to blow it out. I also leave the wax left by the previous candle when I replace it with a new one, even if the colour’s different.

Wabi Sabi: accepting imperfection

Now that I’ve started feeling more relaxed and content with every supposedly unwanted drop, I’ve begun to explore the serenity I’ve been gaining through candles. I came across the book Wabi Sabi: Japanese Wisdom for a Perfectly Imperfect Life by Beth Kempton. The author mixes ancient Japanese wisdom with practical everyday ideas and addresses topics such as minimalism, mindfulness and the art of letting go. Wabi Sabi’s an aesthetic and philosophical view that emphasises the beauty in things that are imperfect, fleeting and incomplete.

Reference books

Wabi Sabi

English, Beth Kempton, 2018

Reference books

Wabi Sabi

English, Beth Kempton, 2018

The book has inspired me to rethink my use of candles and to find inner peace about other areas of my life – work, sports or even dating. Struggling to write? Then I’ll just let it sit and do something else instead. A guy hasn’t replied after a date, even though he was already making plans for the future? I guess I’ll just let him go instead of racking my brains over it. The candles of Mexico have taught me that things don’t have to be perfect to be valuable or beautiful.